Hi just want to put it out there and see if any other married guy's have this problem. I have been chatting to a few women and going great guns until I tell them I am married and in an open relationship my mrs has even verified this with one woman, but the won't have a bar of it this has happed a few times, yet I have a few mates that are with women and are committed but pull a root no worries and a few of the women have known there circumstances. Anyway rant over.
Cheers Adam.
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Sexpert
maybe its the married bit, i know your relationship is open but it could still be that, maybe they want more than just sex. they might want the chance of an ongoing relationship. do your mates tell the women they go with that theyre married/involved. just my idea on it.
Sexlightened
Our suggestion would be to contact a few couples, you can still play separately, and the stalking element is taken care of. We play together, but given the right couple and if we are convinced the episode will not end in tears we are happy to play separately. Just a thought
Warming the Bed
We are probably the type that frustrates you.
You need some perspective too, there are hundreds of single guys on here, so when we look for a guy for a 3 some we avoid any guy in a relationship open or otherwise.
Why?
As said, there are plenty of people to choose from, its not hard to find a guy prepared to have sex with us, in fact the hard part is picking from those willing.
So why do we say no to those in relationships?
Its 2 fold...
1 - Many guys lie about their relationship being open, they are simply cheating, sure in your case your wife might jump on he phone and verify it, but still thats a head fuck when single guys are a dime a dozen.
2 - This is something you probably do not even think of, so you want to fuck me, but my guy cant fuck your wife?
That's not real fair is it, this is why us and many others go for single guys, less hassle, no need to check with partners and often the single guy aint getting any, you however have a partner and are likely to be getting some at home but you or she does not want to share, so if we cannot have some of your cake you cannot have any of ours lol
That's probably a little harsh, the main deal is there are a lot of single guys so why bother with the added complication of some guy claiming to be in an open relationship.
Orgasminator
very well said. we are the same, we like to play with couples but that said others dont care.
Maybe I worded my post wrong it was a simple question, I have let my wife have some fun she has been seeing a guy for over a year now and loves it she is happy with that and doesn't realise I am never going to get to have any fun as I am married I suppose more fool me.
And for the record not all men are the same
Quote by tonza10
she is happy with that and doesn't realise I am never going to get to have any fun
There seems to be a few things wrong in that statement.
You play as a couple don't you? You seem to have plenty of couple friends on here. Aren't you getting some fun that way? Is that not enough?
And why doesn't she realise whatever it is that's bothering you? Haven't you spoken to her about it?
The absolute number 1 rule in swinging is to always share your feelings with your partner.
Or is it that you're a bit jealous of her having a regular play-alone partner? Does it seem unfair that you don't have the same? If you're in any way not comfortable with her having a regular/long term swinging partner, then share your concerns with her. If you're just peeved that you can't get the same, well you're plum out of luck because this game is really difficult for lone guys of any variety (ie. single or attached but playing alone). That tit-for-tat approach can be dangerous too. You should share your concerns with her.
Oh, and in case you missed it... we would suggest you talk to her and share your feelings and concerns with her.
Orgasminator
makes no difference, your still a married bloke and lots of women dont want them. if your wife has a regular and it upsets you talk to her. if you cant be honest then stop swinging.
is he single or married ? is she too excited to see him or is she doing stuff for him and not you like dressing up etc. is thats whats upsetting you?
women will always find it easy to pick up. men outnumber women on here 50 to 1 . if its that bad talk to your wife, explain your side and stop it, its that simple, if shes using him for just sex then it wont upset her. if she gets pissed off then look deeper into the relationship.
I appreciate all the comments they are all good points, we have an awesome relationship we haven't had the chance to play as a couple yet it is a bit hard with kids. I am not jealous in any way of her I have given her the privilege, I was just simply just venting. It is a bit dissapointing when you have been chatting to a woman for a few months and been honnest all the way go out for coffee and things then she says I know you married but this is not right, fair call on her behalf I was just disappointed thats all I was getting at.
Sexpert
i know what your saying adam thats why we only play as a couple as we find it the only way to be fair on both sides. i know i wouldnt like it if mr was out with a "friend" all the time and i was home. but good luck with finding a play mate
first time i have ever posted on the forums,
but i always read what people have to say on here,,,, and i really had to say something in adams defence as it looks like people were attacking him for being in an open relationship,, and i really understand how hard it is for the male of the couple to find a lady friend/playmate for meetings, as we are in the same situation, where it is hard for hubby to find a lady for meetings ,, yet i have spoken to married men on here who are cheating and admit it, yet they reckon they still find other women to play with them , this really makes me wonder, do women prefer cheating ones?? or are these cheating guys making it all up?
we also meet couples as we have made some lovely friends in couples on here ,
but would still meet people alone as well if it was easier for hubby to do the same, i just found when talking to different people on the site they were abit shocked when you say you also would meet people alone, it was like shock ! horror ! , i was even told it was like cheating, !!!
everyone needs to get an open mind and leave each to their own,
i wish you luck adam, and many happy meetings 
Sexpert
im not attacking adam, i believe its the married and allowed bit, i do see you point about the ones who do cheat, maybe theres a thrill or forbidden fruit sort of thing happening. it really hard to pick a reason isnt it. maybe the women want more than just sex, they might want a relationship.
Casting the ethics and 'morality' of meeting married men aside, there is also the matter of convenience. If and when we plan to meet, it is never going to be at some random gap of time in the middle of the day (we work) or on the odd night where a married person can "get away". Rather, we are looking to make a night of it, at OUR convenience, which would generally mean a weekend evening, so we would be looking for people who could join us at these times. People who are married are rarely available at peak family times such as weekends - even if you do happen to have 'permission', you are likely to be involved with your own family's social arrangements at the times we are looking. And we would usually be wanting you for more than a quick empty out, which might satisfy you, but doesn't allow for the easy flow of intimacy that we are after. And if you have a partner and family at home, you will be clock watching, consciously or not, and that is not the way to create a natural and relaxed environment.
Meeting anybody at all is an ongoing complex process. This is not a supermarket - you can't just pick your desired item off the shelf and have it, at the best of times. The more variables that are thrown into the mix, the more difficult it becomes.
Orgasminator
ms twiddle, i never even thought of it that way. thanks
