Baabaa's advice line

3 Jan 2012

Baa, I have a question, you appear to have dropped the ball with your responses Is it a new year hang over or have you actually lost your touch? Mr 2bnorti

3 Jan 2012

Quote by wannaplay97
Hey Baa,
Please help me with this issue....
Thanks Mrs Wannaplay

Ok Mrs Wanna ... 1st question of the New Year and straight off the bat with a real problem that seems to be quite common ... hmm where do I start ...
Firstly honesty is always the best policy with all play dates and to be up front with what you are looking for is the best way to start .. unfortunately not everyone plays by these rules
Finding someone to relate to outside of the "sex" is also a big win as not only does it make the sex more pleasurable but also the overall experience is actually better .. nothing worse than not being able to have a social conversation or at least have some common ground.
Now to your situation this does really sound like on the surface a meeting of convenience from the other couple ... great to play when it suited them and then pick up later when it suits again. I'd be careful under these circumstances however a few things may be at play. Is this couple actually an experienced couple or was it a new experience for them. Sometimes when you are working your way to a new experience the excitement and anticipation leads to a lot of conversation and flirting up front. The actual meet also can be very hit and miss .. and a good meet does not necessarily translate into an immediate response. I have found that there can be a post meet let down when after the euphoria dies down there is a reconciliation of what actually transpired. Maybe if they are new there is a sense of guilty pleasure (was it the right thing to do) and then followed by inactivity ... just maybe the return requests are now coming after they have realised what a good thing they had.
But on the other hand there is also the scenario that the couple enjoyed the experience and just wanted the quick root and assumed that it would be there again when they exhausted other options .. in that case i'd say close the door.
You are actually in the prime position .. you have done nothing wrong and can control what happens next. The other couple needs to communicate and be open about what they want. throw the question back to them and be blunt if need be ... no point in beating around the bush so to speak. There is plenty of fun to be had and no time in wasting it on some people. Remember you can be quite blunt and open without being nasty soi I'm sure you can find an appropriate way to respond. I suggest contacting them and let them know how you feel .. if you enjoyed their company let them know but also expect the same honest response. Be prepared for an honest response back and move on from there.
At the end of the day not everyone is honest about their reasons or motives to be here .. as long as you are the you are in front.

3 Jan 2012

Quote by 2BNorti
Baa, I have a question, you appear to have dropped the ball with your responses
Is it a new year hang over or have you actually lost your touch?
Mr 2bnorti

Ah Mr2b ... well I have been very busy with Xmas and the New Year festivities online but fortunately mostly offline ;)
I'm generally closed on public holidays and weekends but for my patients I will endeavor to answer all request within 24-48 hours ....
Perhaps I haven't advertised my hours of operation enough and my program guidelines .. maybe the fine print is actually too small to see.
Either way Mr2b .. touch is something I will never lose as it's questionable on whether I had it in the first place lol. But on a serious note .. back to regular programming and the New Year is looking up for dr baa
:evil2:

3 Jan 2012

Hi baabaa Why must I ask a question? Mrs2b

3 Jan 2012

Quote by 2BNorti
Hi baabaa
Why must I ask a question?
Mrs2b

Hi Mrs2b
First thanks for your question ....
and how to do answer such an intriguing question? Do I need to consult my journals or should I rely on my quick wit and good looks lol.
Well firstly now that you have asked a question I can for one see your lovely profile pic in my thread .. always great to read and be able to see that sexy ass smile

Second is that I have heard from Mr2b that my response will be judged .. one can only wonder what that means .. but if Mr2b throws out the challenge I'll accept.
Third I was always interested in seeing what question you would ask when you eventually would ... now I do get a slightly better read on you and can book you in for further appointments as required. Remember that although this is a free service I do work busy hours and my client list is growing .. so get in fast! Now you have asked a question you are put on the V.I.P list which comes with special extras ...
So there you go 2b .. it wasn't that painful ... just like a little prick ;) well a hard one anyway
dr baa xx:jagsatwork:

5 Jan 2012

Ok serious question - it is now two weeks until I board a plane and begin my Travels in Australia. I have finally mastered the chips - Hot chips scenario thank you Baa you rock. :thumbup: Now i hope im not asking to much but could you give me a run down on the current slang/sayings. The other day someone said oh thats gammon (now in the Uk thats bacon apparently they meant funny) see my current issue here lol Also what is a respectable number of shoes i can bring do you think 5 pairs is excessive should i just bring flip flops (oh you call them thongs) see what i mean!! And finally what are the chances of a snake coming up the toilet while im trying to have a wee, what do you do to prevent such cases from happening :P Any help you can give me will be amazing and i certainly owe you a beer - thankyou xx

5 Jan 2012

Dear man of the world Im calling on and seeking your wisdom ...Why does lightning strike crooked not straight down...

5 Jan 2012

Quote by sarahadmin
Ok serious question - it is now two weeks until I board a plane and begin my Travels in Australia.
I have finally mastered the chips - Hot chips scenario thank you Baa you rock. :thumbup:
Now i hope im not asking to much but could you give me a run down on the current slang/sayings. The other day someone said oh thats gammon (now in the Uk thats bacon apparently they meant funny) see my current issue here lol
Also what is a respectable number of shoes i can bring do you think 5 pairs is excessive should i just bring flip flops (oh you call them thongs) see what i mean!!
And finally what are the chances of a snake coming up the toilet while im trying to have a wee, what do you do to prevent such cases from happening :P
Any help you can give me will be amazing and i certainly owe you a beer - thankyou xx

Hi Sarah hope u have a nice welcome to oz and we can share some amber fluids (beer).
Gammon can also refer to a fine piece of ass so maybe they were referring to you ;)
Aussie slang well where do I start :
Ok let's start with location, someone from NSW is a cockroach and the folks from Victoria are referred to as the Mexicans. The lovely people from QLD and their capital Brisvegas are known as Banana benders or cane toads. The map of Tasmania however does not relate to a location at all but the pubic region of a female, these days with the smooth look this is rarely used.
White pointers at the beach are not sharks but topless bathers.
Your football is known here as soccer.
A barbie is not a doll but a BBQ.
There are so many more but I suggest that you need a guide or translator. Luckily my professional service has an extras component.
As for the chance of a snake getting you on the loo, well unless it's a trouser snake then chances are slim. Just keep away from the bushes and the drop bears when dumping in the trees.
Well hopefully you have a great time here and feel free to look me up. ;)
PS. As for shoes bring your thongs and a couple of pairs. But I'm sure you will bring some more.

6 Jan 2012

Quote by bbw68
Dear man of the world
Im calling on and seeking your wisdom
...Why does lightning strike crooked not straight down...

Hi bbw and welcome to the advice line ... well two trains of thought ...
first the scientific answer :
Lightning will generally follow the path of least resistance. It acts just like water flowing downhill, which rarely (if ever) flows in a straight line. Lightning will follow a crooked path in order to reserve energy, jumping to and from charged particles in the air, until it reaches the ground
Now the alternate answer :
In Norse mythology thunder and lightning orginate from the hammer wielding Thor .. in Greek lore Zeus also wielded a thunder bolt. Now lightning was used as their almighty weapon and was usually associated with wrath or fury. As you can imagine keeping a lightning bolt straight during a period of rage would be quite difficult and to top it off the visual effect of a crooked bolt always is so much cooler ;)
One thing is certain however ... It's a relatively modern myth that lightning never strikes the same spot twice -- it's also not true. Lightning can strike the same place again and again -- especially if that place features something like a high radio antenna perched on top of a mountain. In spite of evidence to the contrary, the myth still carries on!

6 Jan 2012

Hey baa, I am in an awful predicament.... have a dress up party to go to in just a few weeks time. I really would like to go dressed in something sexually suggestive, (because that would make me very horny... not to mention Mr Hellena) but not over the top... Now being a redhead I thought I would like to go as Jean Holloway (large breasted ravishing redhead from Mad Men.) or Moira (the Sexy smouldering redheaded young maid from American Horror Story) Both hold a certain sexual appeal for me...... what to do??? I am also open to any other suggestions... must begin with the letter M.... Also, if I do go as the maid from American Horror Story, I would love for my husband to go with me as the 'man in the rubber suit' this is a fetish / bondage outfit... black rubber, full face head to toe - He is not too keen - Would you consider donning the suit? After all no one would know... Hmmm, this poses another question...am I evil for thinking of ditching the man? Anyways, better let you get back to your very important work... if you ever need editing help, please don't hesitate to call on me *insert evil smile*.... am great with words and eager to please. Helle XXXX

6 Jan 2012

Quote by Hellena
Hey baa, I am in an awful predicament.... have a dress up party to go to in just a few weeks time. I really would like to go dressed in something sexually suggestive, (because that would make me very horny... not to mention Mr Hellena) but not over the top... Now being a redhead I thought I would like to go as Jean Holloway (large breasted ravishing redhead from Mad Men.) or Moira (the Sexy smouldering redheaded young maid from American Horror Story) Both hold a certain sexual appeal for me...... what to do??? I am also open to any other suggestions... must begin with the letter M....
Also, if I do go as the maid from American Horror Story, I would love for my husband to go with me as the 'man in the rubber suit' this is a fetish / bondage outfit... black rubber, full face head to toe - He is not too keen - Would you consider donning the suit? After all no one would know... Hmmm, this poses another question...am I evil for thinking of ditching the man?
Anyways, better let you get back to your very important work... if you ever need editing help, please don't hesitate to call on me *insert evil smile*.... am great with words and eager to please.
Helle
XXXX

Ooh .. Helle .. I love dress ups .. can I play????
Now you have given me some real hard choices here but I really do have a thing for Chrsitina Hendricks and her character in Mad Men .. I'm sure you would be able to pull it off quite well ;) .. What can you say about Christina .. a smoking hot red head with curves to die for ... mmmm .. fits you like a glove Helle
However despite my desire for Christina I must say your offer of having me in a rubber suit is very interesting indeed ... Now would I be on a leash for you??? And one wonders what happens to a man in a rubber suit once the night is done:evil2:
Well the question you pose is a wicked one and I'd be a bad influence on you if I tried to answer that honestly .. but if your man opts out you know where to find me ...
And yes I could always do with a partner in crime on here ... It's hard being me sometimes lol
Cheers dr baa

7 Jan 2012

Baa, I have recently been introduced to my now new addiction, "pod casts" How did I ever live without them? The subject matter of the ones I listen to are all about the swinging life style. There have been a few that have covered some BDSM and the like. After listening to the different experiences by other ppl, I have to ask. Do you think, hard core kink is something you are just "in to" or do you think that comes with experimentation? Do you think that you should continually experiment with sex and continue to escalate the "kink" level? I have to wonder, if I am uncomfortable with certain things, should I possibly ease myself into them just for the experience? I try to be as open minded as possible in life, but I find that I can be a bit closed up to certain things involving sex. Is this the norm? BTW: have you ever considered having your own SH pod cast? I think it just might work ;) Thanks hunny bunny xxx Mrs Wanna Also...since I am learning heaps of new stuff, expect some off the wall shit from me in the future lol

7 Jan 2012

Quote by deuxplaisircpl
Hello, what have we here?
Seems Baabaa is now signing off as Dr Baa - so, our question naturally is - what institute did Dr Baa study at and under whose tutelage did he most prosper?
Tell us more, good doctor!!
Love from Deux.

Well deux ... After many years and lots of experience on and off the job .. I have secured a prestigious degree from the University of SH …
I have majors in the following areas:
Mositification issues
Swinging dynamics
Porn nostalgia
Fetish repositories
Cunnilingus techniques
I have also managed to obtain a doctorate in the following fields:
Couple intensity
69 degrees of enjoyment
Passion in small places
Sexual ergonomics
My services for those who may be interested outside of the 'free' advice on here include:
Massage therapy
Adventures on the doctor's couch
Physical manipulation
Research studies

7 Jan 2012

Quote by wannaplay97
Baa,
I have recently been introduced to my now new addiction, "pod casts" How did I ever live without them? The subject matter of the ones I listen to are all about the swinging life style. There have been a few that have covered some BDSM and the like.
After listening to the different experiences by other ppl, I have to ask. Do you think, hard core kink is something you are just "in to" or do you think that comes with experimentation? Do you think that you should continually experiment with sex and continue to escalate the "kink" level? I have to wonder, if I am uncomfortable with certain things, should I possibly ease myself into them just for the experience? I try to be as open minded as possible in life, but I find that I can be a bit closed up to certain things involving sex. Is this the norm?
BTW: have you ever considered having your own SH pod cast? I think it just might work ;)
Thanks hunny bunny xxx
Mrs Wanna
Also...since I am learning heaps of new stuff, expect some off the wall shit from me in the future lol

Mrs Wanna
Podcasts are indeed fun and quite informative and a good way to branch out and discover new things. They have certainly come a long way from their humble beginnings!
Now your question is very interesting … mmmm
I'm a somewhat a proponent of the "nature vs. nurture" theory.
This is because there can be psychological traits that are genetically based. Shyness, for example, can be considered a genetic predisposition. It's one that can be reversed through conditioning oneself, but may begin in the genes.
Whether there is a "kinky" gene or not is irrelevant. There may be various genetic predispositions that, combined with external influences, produce what is regarded as "kinky" behavior.
It's easy to blur the issue though, because what is a "norm" from culture to culture, if not region to region within a given culture can be very different. And for what it's worth, what might be held as kinky in a given culture in one century might be regarded as vanilla in the next.
Your tendencies are born in you -- but which ones are released or suppressed will be influenced by your environment and life experiences. Certainly you are on a journey and you will discover what is comfortable or not ..
There is no black-and-white answer to this question. How kinky you are -- or whether you'll be kinky at all -- is a question that has no consistent, absolute answer.
Well Im looking forward to your "off the wall" questions smile

dr baa

12 Jan 2012

Quote by sarahadmin
Now i hope im not asking to much but could you give me a run down on the current slang/sayings.

Sarah,
when in oz and you wanna ripper time its good to hit the road with a tinny.
If your in Perth be sure to hit the Waca for a one dayer. Hopefully the Freo Dr will come early if its a stinker.
When in Sydney, dont miss the coathanger. You can even climb it, but thats a bit exy (moolah betta spent on the flagan brother). Parts of Syd have their share of bogans, and in the local youll stumble across some dogs. Most Poms like it at Bondi or Manly. Those places are great for eye candy, lots of knockers - white pointers too, and a few budgie smugglers, if that floats your boat.
When in Vic, pack the trackie daks man as you dont know what it'll be like. Banana benders are up north.
Never, ever ask a chick for her map of Tassie, unless you want in her pants (but more likely to get a smack in the head).
If you hit the turps at the boozer, your likely to find some mull, if thats your thing. But youll probably come a gutser if its good hydro or purple headers.
Me, now Ive grown up.
Ill have me cab sav and try not to be a galah. But im still a root rat and like to put on me thongs, grab a roadie and head to the billabong, drop the reg grundies and nuddy up. ill sprawl out with me goony, but fair dinkum be gobsmacked when a sheila drops her grundies too for a splash, fark thatll make me crack a fat. Im always there for a Captain Cook.
Travelling through the outback, always ask for mates rates as everyones your mate. Plenty of bludgers'll hit you up for a durry so make sure you stock up at the duty free. Mind you, handing out the durries can get some cracker info. Just remember if someone says there off to the pisser, they mean the can. The never, never is a mighty big place, so if you wanna be on your Pat Malone, youll find you are.
If your goin to a B & S, drop into Vinnies, they have the gear. Your sure to get maggoted as they go off.
Mate, you'll, have a cracker.
anyhoo, i gotta do the Harold Holt
Hooroo.

14 Jan 2012

Nice work mate smile

14 Jan 2012

Quote by baabaa5
Hello, what have we here?
Seems Baabaa is now signing off as Dr Baa - so, our question naturally is - what institute did Dr Baa study at and under whose tutelage did he most prosper?
Tell us more, good doctor!!
Love from Deux.

15 Jan 2012

Dr Baa,
Are there any courses at the University of SH for Single Males in Swinging, especially with dealing with the mental condition of single males replying to ads from couples and females that state clearly "NO SINGLE GUYS" in some shape or form.
Thanks!
Hey acer
One of my favourite topics and one so often discussed. Well I suggest single guys should learn to read first ;). I'm sure that message generally means what it says and you wouldn't have to deal with mental angst if you didn't send an email in the first place.
I have a few things I hold onto as a so called single guy on here. One I'm here for extra fun not for my only fun. Two if you fail to have social skills outside of here then you most likely will be lacking them here as well.
In addition as there are so many single guys here you need to be different. This usually means finding something that sets you apart. Whether it is a great profile, being in chat a lot and participating, contributing to the forums in a positive manner or turning up to meets without expecting an orgy. These things add up over time. It's not one thing but a combination.
One thing is for sure if you are rude and pushy your chances are close to nil. If you expect things to be easy and don't have patience then you will be lost in the crowd.
For those that do persist and try to contribute a little extra to this community there are rewards. You still will be on the outer and in the minority but at least higher up the long list.
There is no degree and you can't study up. Just chalk this one up to life experience.
Cheers
Dr baa

16 Jan 2012

Thanks heaps Dr. Baa, some heaps great insights and info for us single guys trying to make it in this tough world!

16 Jan 2012

Hi Baa We have enjoyed reading your advice line - handled with tasteful quips and ticklish good humour. Keep up the great work. Your remind me of another great writer, weasel worden, of "Why women hate men blog" An old blog but well worth a look. JT

17 Jan 2012

Quote by JTwithlove
Hi Baa
We have enjoyed reading your advice line - handled with tasteful quips and ticklish good humour. Keep up the great work. Your remind me of another great writer, weasel worden, of "Why women hate men blog" An old blog but well worth a look.
JT

Well thank you very much ;)
Compliments are always appreciated and keep me going on this little advice line.
Must have a look at old weasel worden ..... Interesting name to say the least
Cheers dr baa

24 Jan 2012

The dr is back in town. Had my first vacation in over 18 months and am very relaxed and raring to go smile

Looking forward to hearing from you all. Plus getting the next Sydney Meet and Greet organized so hope to bring forward some personal consultations.

29 Jan 2012

Dr Baa, If your in the countryside enjoying the clean air, the grass, the tree's, the peacfullness while having sex , when you find yourself being watched by a magpie and your a crows supporter, where would one go for conselling over being violated like that? can you actualy be brought back from such a hideous experience?

29 Jan 2012

Quote by equilibrium
Dr Baa,
If your in the countryside enjoying the clean air, the grass, the tree's, the peacfullness while having sex , when you find yourself being watched by a magpie and your a crows supporter, where would one go for conselling over being violated like that? can you actualy be brought back from such a hideous experience?

Equilibrium .. what a problem for you .. I'm sure this must put you off balance ;)
You AFL folk are indeed a funny breed or dare I say a species.
First of all I love your description of enjoying the clean air and general tranquility ... you must obviously not live in Sydney and being a crow's fan you must be from Adelaide ... have you ever thought that the issue lay with you? Has the poor magpie indeed been the one violated in seeing a crow have sex?
By the way I do actually think that as birds of a feather both crows and magpies have issues ....
"Contrary to what many people believe, most birds do not have any external reproductive organs, such as penises or testicles. Evolution has done away with such cumbersome things, as an adaptation for flight."
So I'm sure whether you are a crow or a magpie .. heck even a swan ... just keep you bird sex away from us all .. lol
But in the meantime if you are offended and do need some help I would try the Eddie McG advice line ....

6 Feb 2012

Good day to you kind sir. While seeking assistance from my local GP, he suggested that you may be of assistance(good to see you have been getting your name among the wider medical profession) When I am in the process of seeing to Magee and helping her obtain pleasure, at times the body (in particular my left knee) does tend to dislocate itself. Now this is ok as I am used to being able to put it back into place. The problem lies for when it may not go back into its rightful place and I must use alternate means to do so. This generally entails me falling to the floor and bashing it in, and this is where the problem begins. Magee being the delightfully evil woman she is will then show all fellow users on cam me rolling on the ground in pain and people laugh at me (OK I cant hear them all laugh, but I hear some, and this may be another problem, the voices) How would one be able to stop the hurt cause by them laughing, coupled with my hurt in the knee. Should we stop camming or should I amputate???

7 Feb 2012

Quote by Trousers_Magee
Good day to you kind sir.
While seeking assistance from my local GP, he suggested that you may be of assistance(good to see you have been getting your name among the wider medical profession)
When I am in the process of seeing to Magee and helping her obtain pleasure, at times the body (in particular my left knee) does tend to dislocate itself. Now this is ok as I am used to being able to put it back into place.
The problem lies for when it may not go back into its rightful place and I must use alternate means to do so. This generally entails me falling to the floor and bashing it in, and this is where the problem begins.
Magee being the delightfully evil woman she is will then show all fellow users on cam me rolling on the ground in pain and people laugh at me (OK I cant hear them all laugh, but I hear some, and this may be another problem, the voices)
How would one be able to stop the hurt cause by them laughing, coupled with my hurt in the knee. Should we stop camming or should I amputate???

Oh Trousers you do have special needs and they must be taken care of. I'm glad you have sought appropriate advice as there can be no delay in your treatment.
Let's deal with the physical aspect first as this although a great source of humor to the masses is a painful ordeal. Now I would hate to see you amputate but at the same time I would hate to deprive the folks on here of your eventful cam sessions. They are a treat and from a scientific viewpoint well worth the observation time. But I do have an answer as I too have had a number of issues with my shoulders over time. The quick answer is strapping your knee but to add a little spice I suggest learning your technique from a Japanese rope master (Kinbaku) If you are endeavoring to stabilize that troublesome area why not broaden your knowledge and get Magee involved. Perhaps you can learn some nice bindings which you can also administer.
Now the hard part is the mental scars. Voices in your head and the damage of humiliation. What can be done. Again I think we need to work creatively and expand your experience in this area. Perhaps some lessons with a master to explore your subservient side. Embrace your humility and also perhaps learn some techniques which you can in turn use on the devious Magee ;)
Remember practice does lead to long term gains and this I'm sorry is not an easy road to follow. I will guide you through the process slowly and may even need to demonstrate with Magee. All you need to do is observe. I will waive my usual fee as I do care for the result. It's also an inherent part of my values system.
Do setup a regular session and I look forward to the healing process.

8 Feb 2012

oh this is cute

8 Feb 2012

Thankyou very much doctor However we hit another snag when we undertook one of your sessions. I administered the binding process as you advised, it was working a treat up until there was a knock on the door and we could not untie ourselves in a timely fashion. This lead to said person investigating the cause of our delay in not answering and upon seeing us tied together and unable to move, assumed the worst and contacted the constabulary to assist in our freedom. When said constabulary arrived and found us in our naked state and bound in 10 metres of rope, there immediate line of questioning was who did this. Unashamedly we advised the constabulary that it was of our own doing and we engaging in some practice. Now we received a knock on the door a few days later and it was one of the lovely police who attended our previous dire need. Whereupon she has enquired as to the possibility of joining in such fun. We are concerned that should we accept this lovely ladies offer, and if we become in a bind again, how would this young lass explain to her superiors without us making the news. We may need your urgent assistance in refining the technique

9 Feb 2012

We are concerned that should we accept this lovely ladies offer, and if we become in a bind again, how would this young lass explain to her superiors without us making the news.
We may need your urgent assistance in refining the technique
Trousers you do manage to get yourself into some dandy situations. I do hope you duely respected the law and accepted the invitation ;)
I think there is very little to worry about when it comes to her superiors as you'd be surprised at how much they could actually help and dare I say it add a new dimension to your activities.
I can only imagine the bind you and Magee got yourselves into and I must chastise you for not following instructions. I did suggest acquiring the services of a master but you seemingly went ahead into this on your own. This is the hard part about my job as I have to occassionally deliver tough love. This does call for a session on deconstruction and a rebalance of your techniques. Let's start this before it gets terminal.
I suggest you get some practice with some nude yoga before I get there and sort this out.
Also make sure that nice officer is involved too as I would hate for her to come unstuck
as well. I can also help her out seeing she is a friend in need.
Don't worry you are in good hands.
Dr baa

25 Feb 2012

Dr. Baa, Read a few of your solutions, and although some of it sounded batshit crazy, I'm going to ask for your advice anyway. My previous relationship came screaming to a halt and ended when I asked my bi girlfriend what she thought about 3sums. I thought that with her being bisexual and very open about sex, she'd take such a question with a grain of salt or at least a bit of humour, but no, she screamed, slapped me, and stormed out of the room. And so my question is- if ever in a situation where asking a future partner about non mainstream sexual activities (such as threesomes, swinging, cuckolding, dogging, gangbangs, etc.) how should I go about it, other than making sure the room has no sharp objects within her reach? Thanks in advance, Lucas91