Hi all,
just after a little advise from a dif poin of view.
I just sent a message to a couple that literaly told me to f@#k of wan%#r.
Sure i had emailed them a few weeks ago to say hi and had no responce (i didnt realise that i had emailed them)
and sure i sent them back a message in the heat of the moment.
as it turns out they have done this to others aswell.
Ive read the posts on single males and held the same veiw. And yes i am a single male.
Why are some people just plainly rude and abusive?
Any advice would be nice.
Thanks all
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Abuse from members
Sexlightened
Did you think to check their profile ie. read it?
I really can't imagine any couple responding like that for no reason. Maybe not a good reason, but never no reason at all.
That you've messaged them before doesn't help. Nobody wants to get hassled repeatedly by someone they're not interested in.
Did you read their profile? Is there anything in their profile that conflicts with what you wrote or what your own profile states? eg. No single guys; no guys over 30; no cock shots; etc.
If so then you really can't complain if you've been rude in the first place by contacting them (even politely) against their wishes.
Was your opening message fairly direct about wanting to meet up for sex? Some people (like us) don't appreciate that (and we say so in our profile).
Have a good look through all the possible reasons. You might not think something is enough to warrant the response you got - and you are quite likely correct about that - but see if there's any reason at all why you don't fit the criteria that they're looking for.
On a side note - your profile stats list your age as 35, but when you write about yourself you say you're 32. Spinning a bit of BS there doesn't help your credibility. ;)
Quote by Infinite_Sky
oh and Bert prob needs to update his info, he's been a member since 2010I doubt he is intentionally spinning BS
Ah, my bad. I saw April and my brain automatically assumed it was another brand new member complaining. Didn't even read the 2010 part. Apologies to you on that one Bert.
Bert.....
No reason for anyone to be abusive..... EVER...... I think people are well aware of how to block or set their whispers to authorize.....
The couple in question did have they were looking for single males, and also stated that they were happy for anyone to contact them....so yeah the abuse wasn't called for...a polite no thanks is all that is needed.... in saying that ... if they say No and people still contact them or keep sending whispers then yes I can understand the frustration....
Abuse really isn't needed.... best action.... copy and paste the whisper to a moderator.... dont engage in a fight.... it cant end well for anyone...
Sky is right too .... have as much info on your profile as you feel comfortable with.... read profiles ... and after all that... if they are not right ... move on and pretty please use the report profile button on the profile....
Have a good day All .... :)
and pretty please use the report profile button on the profile....
Have a good day All .... :) Jazz, this may be pre-emptive and if so may a Mod feel free to delete it but ..............
As a couple can we say a big 'thank you' for the support for Bert, a single guy that you have shown by stating that the profile of the couple in question did not exclude Bert's message in any way as from our view, it seems far to easy to assume the single was in the wrong when there are many who do the right thing.
Now as hypocritical of the above comment as this may seem, certainly if Bert had messaged the couple and had received a 'thanks but no thanks' then he was wrong to message them a second time, but only if he received a reply initially and that does not seem to be the case.
In our opinion, there is no excuse for discourtesy, rudeness or abuse as a response to messages, be that in a forum post, a message or the chat room as there are better and more 'adult' ways to handle such situations.
So again, thank you for supporting Bert and to Bert we simply say keep looking as it takes a long time and a lot of communication with people to find that 'person/couple' that seek and accept you.
Sheba Gazz
Hi all and thanks for the support,
Just to clarify the questions that have been raised is that there profile says that they were looking for single males, there profile seemed to fit the bill, and no they didnt responde to my first message. both messages that were sent were not in the sexual nature at all. basicaly just saying hi and asking if they would like to chat some more.
Thanks Bert
Ps thanks for the idea to update my profile (some thing i should have done long ago i guess)
Sorry that you were abused. There really is no reason for it. There are some fruit loops out there. I was contacted by a couple, or should I say pursued quite vigorously. When I messaged them back they said, 'oh we have other couples that we've known for longer that we will contact you when our schedule is open'. We were like ...whaaat, you pursued us, now you make it sound like you're doing us a favour! Very strange.
Rise above it. Keep cool if it happens again and say something like, 'oh, you sounded much classier in your profile than that!'
or 'your profile gave the impression that you were open to single males, perhaps it's time to update it.'
Take care
