Crotch shots: why do men send them?
Amy Gray August 08, 2013
Former US congressman Anthony Weiner admitted to sending lewd photos of himself to women. Photo: Reuters
Though it is often portrayed as the ruin of vulnerable teens or swaggering twentysomethings, recent news has shown that older people are just as enamoured with sharing explicit shots.
Queensland MP Peter Dowling has shown himself, quite literally, to be a fan of crotch shots having sent several to his mistress.
He has since stepped aside as chairman of the parliamentary ethics committee, news which pales into comparison against the lurid sheen of a man swizzling his stick in a cheeky red wine.
Elsewhere, disgraced former US congressman and now New York mayoral candidate Anthony Wiener has been caught, once again, sending explicit photos to women. Under the name 'Carlos Danger', no less.
Given the amount of hilarity we derived from such news, just why do men send crotch shots and do they think women like them?
Crucially, context is everything when it comes to crotch shots – whether the person is known, if you're in the throes of unconsummated attraction or if conversation is steering towards that direction.
Melbourne man Anthony Marshall is an avowed fan of sharing photos of his package.
'I like showing off what I regard as a lovely looking cock,' he says. Unsurprisingly, when Marshall has sent unsolicited shots, he's 'usually a highly aroused state … aka just very horny'.
For most women interviewed, such shots don't seem to produce huge appreciation, but the reaction does depend on the length of time they have known the person.
For Katie* in Oakleigh, it depends on the physical progression of their relationship.
'I really could take them or leave them unless I haven't slept with the guy yet. Then I'm kinda interested to see what he's working with!'
Georgia* in Doncaster agrees: 'It depends on whether the cock shot was solicited: if it was, I usually keep the photo and cheekily grin to myself occasionally when I see it. If it wasn't, I either roll my eyes or snort a little laugh, depending on how good-natured I'm feeling that day.'
The more women you talk to, the more they seem to concur it's an unintended joke replayed for the hilarity of their friends.
I remember one friend who would scroll through all the recent crotch shots she had received, some of which were decorated for seasonal events (let's just say a Valentine's Day bouquet of roses will never look the same again).
This indulged humour is reinforced when you ask why some women keep crotch shots sent to them. For Van Badam in Melbourne, the answer is simple: 'because it's funny! I have shown them to all my friends for laughs!'
Marshall is unfazed by this: 'If they show their girlfriends then that could be a bonus … I have been told I have a good looking cock. I don't know if I would be sending pics if I wasn't so sure I wouldn't be laughed at. He adds, 'If you know what you have is top quality, then it's not so daunting.'
Many explicit photos are sent after introductions via online dating services or apps.
According to Badham: 'I received them in the context of internet dating … if you even engage with they send you cock shots. You should see my computer."
Georgia concurs, 'I was nearly instantly bombarded with either cock shots, or demands to see either a photo of my breasts or ... .
'It wasn't that I find the act of exchanging such photos offensive,' she says. 'My issue was that I wasn't given a choice. I have received and sent not entirely PG-rated photos and enjoyed the experience, but it was always an act that was mutual and consensual. Having someone send you an unsolicited dickpic feels like a more graphic version of being heckled/wolf-whistled on the street.'
Perhaps this is where the true motivation of the crotch shot lies: like the act of heckling and wolf-whistling, it is a performance that benefits the man more than the intended recipient of his affection.
Marshall tentatively agrees. 'I would say the sending is more arousing' before adding that he derives pleasure from 'both the act of sending and also imagining the response of the receiver. Even more so if the pic I am sending has just been taken.'
According to him, any 'positive response in return is a bonus and I suppose also a encouragement for the next cock/nude pic send'.
'What one girl admires another may shun,' he says. "Perhaps though they all enjoy the fact they were deemed worthy of being sent a cock shot."
* names have been changed
